Should You Tell Your Confidante About Your Cheating Spouse?
When you come to know of an affair of your spouse, you tend to become weak emotionally. You become highly suggestible. While being in this state of mind, you may also have an urge to share your feelings with a confidante. This may appear normal but you must be aware of the dangers involved in talking to a third person, however close he or she is to you, about the affair of your spouse. What are these dangers?
1) Being in a state of emotional overflow, you may spill out your feelings to the other person. The other person may be understanding but by sharing your confidences with them, you may be violating the trust inherent in your relationship with your spouse. That your spouse has betrayed you will not justify your exposing your spouse to a third person.
2) There is a chance of your making up with yourspouse, if they repent their action and seek your forgiveness. If this were to happen later, you will curse yourself by talking to a third person about your spouse’s affair. Whenever you meet the confidante, you will think of your indiscretion and feel bad. This may even strain your relationship with your confidants, since you will not feel comfortable facing them.
3) In the event of your forgiving your cheating spouse and getting back with them, the person your confidante will feel embarrassed whenever they meet your spouse in future, either in your presence or alone.
4) Your spouse will feel ashamed if they come to know of your exposing their infidelity to a third person. If this happens when there is an effort at reconciliation, it will affect the chances of the reconciliation happening with your spouse getting alienated by your “betrayal” of them. If this happens after you have got back together, your spouse will feel hurt, angry and let down. Their feelings will be similar to yours when you learn the affair though your confiding your spouse’s affair in someone is not a serious violation of the trust as your spouse’s affair is!
So, think twice before you decide to talk to someone about your cheating spouse. Have in mind the possibility of your cheating spouse becoming your loving wife soon enough!